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Old 09-03-2016, 12:25 PM   #21 (permalink)
Jacob Sartorius
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by _Violet_ View Post
As Blank would say...

The war wages on.
They're good lyrics if they're quotable.
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Old 10-03-2016, 05:22 PM   #22 (permalink)
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I look both ways
Only darkness
Hopeless
Are you lost like me?

Doctors without faces
Walking through these places
Can they see
The country boy in me

I beg you to pull the trigger
And pay the grave digger
His family needs to eat too
And I'm a waste of space like you

This one is nowhere near done. Any opinions?
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Old 10-03-2016, 11:24 PM   #23 (permalink)
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Don't be so concerned with trying to rhyme and you can make something sound very personal without using "I" and "me".
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Old 10-03-2016, 11:31 PM   #24 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Frownland View Post
Don't be so concerned with trying to rhyme and you can make something sound very personal without using "I" and "me".
Noted. Thanks.
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Old 10-04-2016, 12:06 AM   #25 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 1blankmind View Post
I beg you to pull the trigger
And pay the grave digger
His family needs to eat too
And I'm a waste of space like you
I love this part
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Old 10-11-2016, 06:00 PM   #26 (permalink)
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Whatever happened to Alan Smithee? Is he alive?
IMDB says he's got new movies on the rise
But I'm pretty sure that's a lie.

Alan, if you hear me, will you let me know?
I miss the classics of Hellraiser and Burn Hollywood Burn.
You need to make more
I need more Alan Smithee films

Is Alan Smithee alive?
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Old 10-11-2016, 06:03 PM   #27 (permalink)
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im judging you
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I'm not even mad. Seriously I'm not. You're a good dude, and I think and hope you'll become something good
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Old 10-11-2016, 06:04 PM   #28 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Qwertyy View Post
im judging you
As I do the same to you.
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Old 10-28-2016, 05:46 AM   #29 (permalink)
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i think this are quiet good lyrics for a beginner song. dont let you iritate by musiciens who write this song in 5 minutes. I would say you are on a good way. Only thing is: write, write, sing, sing... Then you will get better and better. Try different subjects and music. Have fun!
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Old 10-28-2016, 05:47 AM   #30 (permalink)
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But yeah, the dead flirt thing is a noGooo hehe, i was laughing my ass off. But do your thing man. if these are your thoughts then write it!
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