The many benefits of a child-free life - Music Banter Music Banter

Go Back   Music Banter > Community Center > The Lounge > Current Events, Philosophy, & Religion
Register Blogging Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read
Welcome to Music Banter Forum! Make sure to register - it's free and very quick! You have to register before you can post and participate in our discussions with over 70,000 other registered members. After you create your free account, you will be able to customize many options, you will have the full access to over 1,100,000 posts.

View Poll Results: How do you plead?
I'm a parent 11 17.74%
I'm a child-free woman/man 24 38.71%
I want to have kids someday (please explain) 18 29.03%
I'm undecided 9 14.52%
Voters: 62. You may not vote on this poll

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 04-09-2014, 11:43 PM   #431 (permalink)
Maelian
 
ladyislingering's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Seattle
Posts: 695
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by djchameleon View Post
Also poor lady didn't have any pets growing up. So sad.
I had a cat. He was my baby, my love, my pride and joy. Mostly because he made cute noises once in a while, pooped in a box, didn't destroy stuff, and only did cute things. (And if he did things that weren't cute, like vomiting, it was contained, easy to clean, no Exorcist type of shit) He was only 12 when he passed. I think of him almost every day.

I'll always prefer animals to humans.

I had a customer the other day whose daughter was throwing a fit in the fitting room because her mom wouldn't let her buy high-heeled shoes (she was 11-12, maybe) and her mom walked away and quietly said "Lord, why do I have a child like this?"

It took everything within me not to laugh.
__________________
You and I,
We were born to die.
ladyislingering is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-10-2014, 11:53 AM   #432 (permalink)
Just Keep Swimming...
 
Plankton's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: See signature...
Posts: 7,766
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by FRED HALE SR. View Post
For every story about the disadvantages of having a kid, there really is no better thing that can happen to a person then bringing life into the world.
Of course I agree with this.

There is a bit more to the story too.

I called my Dad and told him what his grand daughter said, but I also added that "I had a good teacher". We both got a bit of the vapors. One of the best moments I've had in a while. 3 generations tied together through the bond of love and respect.
__________________
See location...
Plankton is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-10-2014, 06:34 PM   #433 (permalink)
Brain Licker
 
Xurtio's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 1,083
Default

__________________
H̓̇̅̉yͤ͏mͬ͂ͧn͑̽̽̌ͪ̑͐͟o̴͊̈́͑̇m͛͌̓ͦ̑aͫ̽ͤ̇n̅̎͐̒ͫ͐c̆ͯͫ̋ ̔̃́eͯ͒rͬͬ̄҉
Xurtio is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-11-2014, 04:26 AM   #434 (permalink)
we are stardust
 
Astronomer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Australia
Posts: 2,894
Default

ladyislingering, interesting question - if you were to get pregnant, I'm assuming you would not keep the baby then? What would your thoughts be if you accidentally fell pregnant? Is your plan of action something you've discussed together?

Unrelated, but one thing I disagree with is people who say they want to have kids to that when they are old they have people to look after them and support them. My mother is one of these people, now that she is old and alone she loves to pull the guilt trip on me of "I raised you, now you have to look after me" and doesn't understand that I am a grown adult with my own life to live! (Don't think that I'm some cold-hearted bitch, I do look after my mother as much as I can muster, but she is also a psychopath, whole different story, but yeah...) Yes, when you have children it does mean that when you are old and incapacitated you will be surrounded by younger, fitter people who can help you and look after you but I don't think that should be a complete basis around having children.
__________________
Astronomer is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-11-2014, 05:45 AM   #435 (permalink)
Mate, Spawn & Die
 
Janszoon's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: The Rapping Community
Posts: 24,593
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Astronomer View Post
ladyislingering, interesting question - if you were to get pregnant, I'm assuming you would not keep the baby then? What would your thoughts be if you accidentally fell pregnant? Is your plan of action something you've discussed together?

Unrelated, but one thing I disagree with is people who say they want to have kids to that when they are old they have people to look after them and support them. My mother is one of these people, now that she is old and alone she loves to pull the guilt trip on me of "I raised you, now you have to look after me" and doesn't understand that I am a grown adult with my own life to live! (Don't think that I'm some cold-hearted bitch, I do look after my mother as much as I can muster, but she is also a psychopath, whole different story, but yeah...) Yes, when you have children it does mean that when you are old and incapacitated you will be surrounded by younger, fitter people who can help you and look after you but I don't think that should be a complete basis around having children.
I hear you. My mother-in-law is like that unfortunately. That said, if there were a "the many benefits of having children" I would say that having someone who will be your advocate when you're old is a big plus side of having kids. I look at my grandfather's case as a good example. He saved enough and planned enough so he wasn't a burden on anyone, but his children and grandchildren were still there to check on him and make sure he was getting everything he needed once it became hard for him to do those things for himself.
Janszoon is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-11-2014, 05:55 AM   #436 (permalink)
A.B.N.
 
djchameleon's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: NY baby
Posts: 11,455
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by ladyislingering View Post
I had a cat. He was my baby, my love, my pride and joy. Mostly because he made cute noises once in a while, pooped in a box, didn't destroy stuff, and only did cute things. (And if he did things that weren't cute, like vomiting, it was contained, easy to clean, no Exorcist type of shit) He was only 12 when he passed. I think of him almost every day.
Well see you were able to have a pet as a kid as well as numerous other kids all over the world.

I don't even get that part of your argument that you mentioned earlier but it's fine. I won't go through your list and pick apart every single argument you had.
__________________
Fame, fortune, power, titties. People say these are the most crucial things in life, but you can have a pocket full o' gold and it doesn't mean sh*t if you don't have someone to share that gold with. Seems simple. Yet it's an important lesson to learn. Even lone wolves run in packs sometimes.


Quote:
Originally Posted by RoxyRollah View Post
IMO I don't know jack-**** though so don't listen to me.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Franco Pepe Kalle View Post
The problem is that most police officers in America are psychopaths.
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Batlord View Post
You're a terrible dictionary.
djchameleon is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-11-2014, 09:15 AM   #437 (permalink)
Crusher of tiny Nords
 
Carpe Mortem's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Ugly Bag of Mostly Water
Posts: 1,363
Default

I've done a lot of babysitting, and love hanging out with kids, charming little people.... but I have zero interest in raising them.

Way I see it... they're a hobby. A hobby I'm not interested in, sometimes the only hobby some people can get into. I have like 9000 others, no room for something else requiring so much dedication.
__________________
[SIG][/SIG]
Mirth is King


Be Loving & Open With
My Emotions
Carpe Mortem is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-11-2014, 01:04 PM   #438 (permalink)
Maelian
 
ladyislingering's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Seattle
Posts: 695
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Astronomer View Post
ladyislingering, interesting question - if you were to get pregnant, I'm assuming you would not keep the baby then? What would your thoughts be if you accidentally fell pregnant? Is your plan of action something you've discussed together?

Unrelated, but one thing I disagree with is people who say they want to have kids to that when they are old they have people to look after them and support them. My mother is one of these people, now that she is old and alone she loves to pull the guilt trip on me of "I raised you, now you have to look after me" and doesn't understand that I am a grown adult with my own life to live! (Don't think that I'm some cold-hearted bitch, I do look after my mother as much as I can muster, but she is also a psychopath, whole different story, but yeah...) Yes, when you have children it does mean that when you are old and incapacitated you will be surrounded by younger, fitter people who can help you and look after you but I don't think that should be a complete basis around having children.
If I were to accidentally become pregnant (which is nearly inconceivable, considering the tight hold of control I have over my entire body) and natural remedies failed me, I would ultimately seek out proper care for an abortion. Ki has some... moral issues with abortion, but, I think, as most men with a distaste for the life-saving operation, he dismisses it without learning the facts, and doesn't even have a uterus, so it's not an issue he'd be personally concerned with to a sensible degree - HOWEVER, I do know that he would be accepting of my decision, because he loves me and cares about what's best for my health.

I think it's silly that people expect their children to act as caretakers in the last stages of their life. While I have seen it happen (my future father in law has spent several years of his life taking care of his parents, and was with his mother up until her last few seconds of life) I don't think it's as common of an occurrence as people seem to think it is. I have no plans to concern myself with my parents when it's their time to go. Everyone will die eventually; I haven't seen any of my actual blood relatives in about 3 years and I'm not bothered by this.

What happens if you outlive your child? Does that mean your plans for an end-of-life caretaker in training have failed you? Do you have to try again? The entire argument of "who will take care of you when you're old" is ridiculous. If I (and my partner) somehow make it to old age, comfortably, the funds will be there for professional end-of-life care. Because I didn't waste my resources on children.

What happens if your life is cut short? Did you have a child in vain? What if that child grows up to be a childfree adult? There is so much more to life than breeding for the sake of extending the life of your genetics or using your spawn for your own employment. It just seems senseless.

I like you. You seem to "get it".

Quote:
Originally Posted by Janszoon View Post
I hear you. My mother-in-law is like that unfortunately. That said, if there were a "the many benefits of having children" I would say that having someone who will be your advocate when you're old is a big plus side of having kids. I look at my grandfather's case as a good example. He saved enough and planned enough so he wasn't a burden on anyone, but his children and grandchildren were still there to check on him and make sure he was getting everything he needed once it became hard for him to do those things for himself.
And that's good. That's alright. That relationship was likely built on love. There are so few that have children because they love children, because they want to nurture and adore something that isn't guaranteed to ever return the sentiment. Those are parents. And there are some good parents out there. It's obvious that there was a proper upbringing for your grandfather's children (and grandchildren) but this nuclear family thing is not typical by any means.

Good, ideal, but less common than it used to be.

My problem is with people who were better off never having children because they've essentially just bred them for no reason at all, with no intention of being a parent, with no desire to be a parent, and instead of choosing the compassionate route of just not having children, they've subjected another life form to a miserable existence. (Just fyi I was definitely an "accident" child and neither of my parents were ever terribly fond of me, but my father had taken a slight liking to me in my adulthood - though never seems to answer my calls anymore.)

Quote:
Originally Posted by djchameleon View Post
Well see you were able to have a pet as a kid as well as numerous other kids all over the world.

I don't even get that part of your argument that you mentioned earlier but it's fine. I won't go through your list and pick apart every single argument you had.
What?

These days I'm even second-guessing how much time I'd have for a cat (which makes me kind of sad, because I love cats, but neither of us are really ever home) but I'd still rather have a cat than a child. My arms were built for holding cats (seriously, I don't know what to do with children, and I'm glad that nobody around me tries to hand their stinky spawn off on me) and I wish there was one in my lap right now, but logic prevails and I'd rather be able to be a good mom to my cat than to just have a cat and never be home.

I don't understand why people do illogical things. In this day and age, with the money being tight, the jobs being ****ty, the environment going to hell, the school systems pathetic, it's not logical to have children. It's not compassionate to have children. Unless somehow you have unlimited funds and they'll never have to worry about anything (ever) - in which case you'd still be doing society a great injustice by raising a kid with serious entitlement issues.

With the way things are these days, sometimes I seriously consider the value of voluntary human extinction.
__________________
You and I,
We were born to die.
ladyislingering is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-11-2014, 03:54 PM   #439 (permalink)
A.B.N.
 
djchameleon's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: NY baby
Posts: 11,455
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by ladyislingering View Post
What?

These days I'm even second-guessing how much time I'd have for a cat (which makes me kind of sad, because I love cats, but neither of us are really ever home) but I'd still rather have a cat than a child. My arms were built for holding cats (seriously, I don't know what to do with children, and I'm glad that nobody around me tries to hand their stinky spawn off on me) and I wish there was one in my lap right now, but logic prevails and I'd rather be able to be a good mom to my cat than to just have a cat and never be home.

I don't understand why people do illogical things. In this day and age, with the money being tight, the jobs being ****ty, the environment going to hell, the school systems pathetic, it's not logical to have children. It's not compassionate to have children. Unless somehow you have unlimited funds and they'll never have to worry about anything (ever) - in which case you'd still be doing society a great injustice by raising a kid with serious entitlement issues.

With the way things are these days, sometimes I seriously consider the value of voluntary human extinction.
How would you not be able to have a pet with a kid? Just like you were able to have a pet growing up as a kid it's not that big of a deal and I have no idea why you added that to your list.

People have had children for years and it doesn't matter about having ideal conditions to have these children in. If the person had a sense of family they would do everything to protect their child. You don't have to be rich just to have children. You yourself wouldn't be born as so many of us that are alive today if people had that silly notion that you do.

If people thought the way you do the human population wouldn't be as large as it is and you most likely wouldn't exist but I guess you would be happy about that because you view life as a miserable condition that you have to suffer through. That's just sad in my eyes but I get why you feel that way especially if you had horrible family conditions growing up and don't value family whatsoever.
__________________
Fame, fortune, power, titties. People say these are the most crucial things in life, but you can have a pocket full o' gold and it doesn't mean sh*t if you don't have someone to share that gold with. Seems simple. Yet it's an important lesson to learn. Even lone wolves run in packs sometimes.


Quote:
Originally Posted by RoxyRollah View Post
IMO I don't know jack-**** though so don't listen to me.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Franco Pepe Kalle View Post
The problem is that most police officers in America are psychopaths.
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Batlord View Post
You're a terrible dictionary.
djchameleon is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-11-2014, 05:01 PM   #440 (permalink)
Maelian
 
ladyislingering's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Seattle
Posts: 695
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by djchameleon View Post
How would you not be able to have a pet with a kid? Just like you were able to have a pet growing up as a kid it's not that big of a deal and I have no idea why you added that to your list.

People have had children for years and it doesn't matter about having ideal conditions to have these children in. If the person had a sense of family they would do everything to protect their child. You don't have to be rich just to have children. You yourself wouldn't be born as so many of us that are alive today if people had that silly notion that you do.

If people thought the way you do the human population wouldn't be as large as it is and you most likely wouldn't exist but I guess you would be happy about that because you view life as a miserable condition that you have to suffer through. That's just sad in my eyes but I get why you feel that way especially if you had horrible family conditions growing up and don't value family whatsoever.
It's not necessarily something that's easily done. Children don't seem to know how to act around animals (or their parents are lazy and fail to teach them how to act - I can never tell) and then when they piss the animal off and the poor thing retaliates, it's the animal's fault ... ridiculous. I hate how people abandon their animals because they're going to have a child. (Not everyone does this, but it's a sick trend that needs to stop.)

I think you seem to have this idea in your head that overpopulation isn't a reality, and a problem. Most people are unsuitable for breeding, and if they didn't, it wouldn't hurt humanity. There are literally billions of people on this earth. Billions. If the population was curbed just a little, there'd hardly be a discernible difference. There are people in this world who are so silly that they react to the idea that some people don't want to breed, by saying "ARE YER TRYIN TAH KILL HOOMANITY??!" ... siiiiigh.
__________________
You and I,
We were born to die.
ladyislingering is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Similar Threads



© 2003-2024 Advameg, Inc.