The Christianity Thread

**Janszoon** · 06-02-2016, 12:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Neapolitan

I guess the only thing represented by Religion is the negative stuff. You can go to Bible school and they can tell you are full of wonder, intelligent, beautiful, courageous, strong, and (to paraphrase) full of potential to do good. In a way it is like a drill sergeant, it breaks you down and then builds you up. It makes you Gung ho to go out and fight the evils in the world. Not through war, but through righting the wrongs in the world. Like feeding the hungry. Forgiving and forgetting.

I forget a lot of things. I never realized that made me such a great guy.

Chula Vista · 06-02-2016, 12:15 PM

Me too. We had a small Church that was literally less than a 5 minute walk from my house and the minister lived right across the street.

I started falling away as my life got ****tier and ****tier to the point of a failed suicide attempt when I was 13. As part of trying to get myself back on track I did a very serious read of the bible from cover to cover. After digesting it all I made the absolute decision that it was a load of wishful thinking, along with a few good moral lessons, and a whole lot of hate, fear, revenge, and shaming wrapped up in fairy tales.

Bought a guitar at 14, learned how to rock, and voila', I was saved.

Plankton · 06-02-2016, 12:16 PM

Music is truth. Music is life.

I read the Bible cover to cover many times. It was the only book in the cell.

Ol’ Qwerty Bastard · 06-02-2016, 12:18 PM

So Chula, is what you're really trying to say that we should be going to rock concerts instead of church? Cause if so I wholeheartedly agree.

Chula Vista · 06-02-2016, 12:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Qwertyy

So Chula, is what you're really trying to say that we should be going to rock concerts instead of church? Cause if so I wholeheartedly agree.

Concerts, clubs, coffee houses, or just slap on Pink Floyd with a good set of cans. It's all good.

**Frownland** · 06-02-2016, 12:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Plankton

They never said that was an option. Que the gay porn music.

...wait. Is Beelzey a dude even? Which bathroom does it use?

Hell's probably a lot cooler than heaven. I hear butt stuff isn't allowed up there.

GuD · 06-02-2016, 12:30 PM

I wonder if the whole eve stealing the aplle thing is an analogy for fisting and squeezing someone's prostate. Speed makes me think odd things.

Plankton · 06-02-2016, 12:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Frownland

Hell's probably a lot cooler than heaven. I hear butt stuff isn't allowed up there.

Well, yeah but that still doesn't answer my question. Actually, I'd like to know a couple things. I've compiled a detailed list:

Am I pitching
Is Beelzebub a dude
Are there hot Asian chicks if he is
Lube

**Frownland** · 06-02-2016, 12:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Plankton

Well, yeah but that still doesn't answer my question. Actually, I'd like to know a couple things. I've compiled a detailed list:

Am I pitching
Is Beelzebub a dude
Are there hot Asian chicks if he is
Lube

Getting butt****ed =/= pitching
Satan's whatever you don't want him to be, baby
Probably no lube except for what you can sweat out
I'm sure there are ladies of all races sharing hell with us

Plankton · 06-02-2016, 12:38 PM

Well, that settles it then. Thanks for clearing this whole mess up. I'm off to do things.

06-02-2016, 12:15 PM	#572 (permalink)
Chula Vista Toasted Poster Join Date: Oct 2014 Location: SoCal by way of Boston Posts: 11,332	Me too. We had a small Church that was literally less than a 5 minute walk from my house and the minister lived right across the street. I started falling away as my life got **tier and **tier to the point of a failed suicide attempt when I was 13. As part of trying to get myself back on track I did a very serious read of the bible from cover to cover. After digesting it all I made the absolute decision that it was a load of wishful thinking, along with a few good moral lessons, and a whole lot of hate, fear, revenge, and shaming wrapped up in fairy tales. Bought a guitar at 14, learned how to rock, and voila', I was saved. __________________ “The fact that we live at the bottom of a deep gravity well, on the surface of a gas covered planet going around a nuclear fireball 90 million miles away and think this to be normal is obviously some indication of how skewed our perspective tends to be.”

06-02-2016, 12:16 PM	#573 (permalink)
Plankton Just Keep Swimming... Join Date: Apr 2012 Location: See signature... Posts: 7,766	Music is truth. Music is life. I read the Bible cover to cover many times. It was the only book in the cell. __________________ See location...

06-02-2016, 12:30 PM	#577 (permalink)
GuD Dude... What? Join Date: Oct 2013 Posts: 1,322	I wonder if the whole eve stealing the aplle thing is an analogy for fisting and squeezing someone's prostate. Speed makes me think odd things. __________________ I spit bullets in my feet Every time I speak So I write instead And still people want me dead ~msc

06-02-2016, 12:38 PM	#580 (permalink)
Plankton Just Keep Swimming... Join Date: Apr 2012 Location: See signature... Posts: 7,766	Well, that settles it then. Thanks for clearing this whole mess up. I'm off to do things. __________________ See location...