offensive jokes *giggles* (track, quote) - Music Banter Music Banter

Go Back   Music Banter > Community Center > The Lounge > Games, Lists, Jokes and Polls
offensive jokes *giggles* offensive jokes *giggles* (track, quote)
Register Blogging Today's Posts
Welcome to Music Banter Forum! Make sure to register - it's free and very quick! You have to register before you can post and participate in our discussions with over 70,000 other registered members. After you create your free account, you will be able to customize many options, you will have the full access to over 1,100,000 posts.

Reply
Page 29 of 69 « First 192728 29 303139 Last »
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 05-11-2006, 02:06 PM   #281 (permalink)
"Your mom?"
 
Levithan's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Hell...
Posts: 507
Default
Three midgets walk into a bar. They all take a seat at the bar and order drinks. After a few more beers the first midget looks at his hands and says:
"I reckon ive got the worlds smallest hands"
Intregued by this statement the barman looks over:
"I reckon your right there mate" He says "Why dont you go check it out with the Guiness book of records"
To which the midget replies
"Y'know what Ill do that" and leaves
Then the second midget jumps of his chair and says
"I bet ive got the worlds smallest feet"
The barman again replies with
"I reckon you have mate, go get it checked out"
The second midget finishes his drink and runs after the first midget
After a few more beers, the third midget goes
"I reckon ive got the worlds smallest penis"
The barman looks over and goes
"Woah, thats pretty small mate, why dont you go get it checked out"

The next day, the first midget walks in and says
"Offical, Worlds smallest hands!"
The barman offers him a free drink, when suddenly the second midget walks in and goes
"Its offical, Worlds smallest feet"
The barman and the other midget congratulate him and the drink flows. When suddenly the third midget bursts through the door in flood's of tears. The barman, worried about his friend, asks:
"It didn't go so well then?"
To which the midget replies
"No it didn't. Who the fuck is this Right-Track?"

Sorry mate...Had to get you back for the brummie jokes you made
__________________
Wieder lieg ich auf der lauerDenn wir spielen unser spiel. Wieder wart ich an der mauer. Wieder steh ich kurz vorm ziel


I dont like Prince Phillip because he's a racist.I also dont like the Queen because she's German...so that leaves me in a funny situation

Quote:
Originally Posted by dirt mcgirt View Post
this pole about famouz peds only son. urban hatmonger gotta get his work reconized, gotta make a name fo hisself. naamean?
Quote:
Originally Posted by littleknowitall View Post
ad anyone wanting rampant sex with a hairy horny welshman may feel free to take me up on that one :D
Levithan is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-11-2006, 02:17 PM   #282 (permalink)
Atchin' Akai
 
right-track's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Unamerica
Posts: 8,723
Default
^ Har har, very funny.

That genuinly took me by surprise just then, when I saw the punchline.
For a split second I felt humiliated...until I remembered I have a large willy.
right-track is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-11-2006, 02:21 PM   #283 (permalink)
"Your mom?"
 
Levithan's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Hell...
Posts: 507
Default
Sorry mate, couldnt be helped...Needed payback!

__________________
Wieder lieg ich auf der lauerDenn wir spielen unser spiel. Wieder wart ich an der mauer. Wieder steh ich kurz vorm ziel


I dont like Prince Phillip because he's a racist.I also dont like the Queen because she's German...so that leaves me in a funny situation

Quote:
Originally Posted by dirt mcgirt View Post
this pole about famouz peds only son. urban hatmonger gotta get his work reconized, gotta make a name fo hisself. naamean?
Quote:
Originally Posted by littleknowitall View Post
ad anyone wanting rampant sex with a hairy horny welshman may feel free to take me up on that one :D
Levithan is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-11-2006, 02:25 PM   #284 (permalink)
The Erroneous Hoodlum
 
Fenixpunk's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: West Side Phoenix
Posts: 2,057
Default
Quote:
Originally Posted by Levithian
Three midgets walk into a bar. They all take a seat at the bar and order drinks. After a few more beers the first midget looks at his hands and says:
"I reckon ive got the worlds smallest hands"
Intregued by this statement the barman looks over:
"I reckon your right there mate" He says "Why dont you go check it out with the Guiness book of records"
To which the midget replies
"Y'know what Ill do that" and leaves
Then the second midget jumps of his chair and says
"I bet ive got the worlds smallest feet"
The barman again replies with
"I reckon you have mate, go get it checked out"
The second midget finishes his drink and runs after the first midget
After a few more beers, the third midget goes
"I reckon ive got the worlds smallest penis"
The barman looks over and goes
"Woah, thats pretty small mate, why dont you go get it checked out"

The next day, the first midget walks in and says
"Offical, Worlds smallest hands!"
The barman offers him a free drink, when suddenly the second midget walks in and goes
"Its offical, Worlds smallest feet"
The barman and the other midget congratulate him and the drink flows. When suddenly the third midget bursts through the door in flood's of tears. The barman, worried about his friend, asks:
"It didn't go so well then?"
To which the midget replies
"No it didn't. Who the fuck is this Right-Track?"

Sorry mate...Had to get you back for the brummie jokes you made

__________________
This message has been approved by Shawn Erroneous - The Declaimed
Fenixpunk is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-11-2006, 02:36 PM   #285 (permalink)
isfckingdead
 
sleepy jack's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 18,967
Default
Quote:
Originally Posted by Levithian
Three midgets walk into a bar. They all take a seat at the bar and order drinks. After a few more beers the first midget looks at his hands and says:
"I reckon ive got the worlds smallest hands"
Intregued by this statement the barman looks over:
"I reckon your right there mate" He says "Why dont you go check it out with the Guiness book of records"
To which the midget replies
"Y'know what Ill do that" and leaves
Then the second midget jumps of his chair and says
"I bet ive got the worlds smallest feet"
The barman again replies with
"I reckon you have mate, go get it checked out"
The second midget finishes his drink and runs after the first midget
After a few more beers, the third midget goes
"I reckon ive got the worlds smallest penis"
The barman looks over and goes
"Woah, thats pretty small mate, why dont you go get it checked out"

The next day, the first midget walks in and says
"Offical, Worlds smallest hands!"
The barman offers him a free drink, when suddenly the second midget walks in and goes
"Its offical, Worlds smallest feet"
The barman and the other midget congratulate him and the drink flows. When suddenly the third midget bursts through the door in flood's of tears. The barman, worried about his friend, asks:
"It didn't go so well then?"
To which the midget replies
"No it didn't. Who the fuck is this Right-Track?"

Sorry mate...Had to get you back for the brummie jokes you made
I don't see why that should be posted in here. How is the truth offensive?


=D
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by METALLICA89 View Post
Ive seen you on muiltipul forums saying Metallica and slayer are the worst **** you kid go suck your **** while you listen to your ****ing emo **** I bet you do listen to emo music
sleepy jack is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-11-2006, 02:37 PM   #286 (permalink)
Atchin' Akai
 
right-track's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Unamerica
Posts: 8,723
Default
^ hush now.
right-track is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-11-2006, 02:45 PM   #287 (permalink)
Uhh-I am Octiposter-huhuh
 
Doc.DGAF's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: South Florida
Posts: 232
Default
Levithian, that was excellent.
__________________
Be not ashamed of mistakes and thus make them crimes.-Confucius

Talking much about oneself can also be a means to conceal oneself.-Friedrich Nietzsche

Now hatred is by far the longest pleasure; men love in haste but they detest at leisure.-Lord Byron

Popularity's bad for you. I avoid it like the plague.-Brian Mulrooney
Doc.DGAF is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-11-2006, 02:46 PM   #288 (permalink)
Atchin' Akai
 
right-track's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Unamerica
Posts: 8,723
Default
Quote:
Originally Posted by Doc.DGAF
Levithian, that was excellent.
But not accurate.
right-track is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-11-2006, 03:03 PM   #289 (permalink)
Uhh-I am Octiposter-huhuh
 
Doc.DGAF's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: South Florida
Posts: 232
Default
Hey, even you should admit it was still funny.
__________________
Be not ashamed of mistakes and thus make them crimes.-Confucius

Talking much about oneself can also be a means to conceal oneself.-Friedrich Nietzsche

Now hatred is by far the longest pleasure; men love in haste but they detest at leisure.-Lord Byron

Popularity's bad for you. I avoid it like the plague.-Brian Mulrooney
Doc.DGAF is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-11-2006, 03:13 PM   #290 (permalink)
Atchin' Akai
 
right-track's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Unamerica
Posts: 8,723
Default
Quote:
Originally Posted by Doc.DGAF
Hey, even you should admit it was still funny.
It was. I laughed out loud. It's a funny joke. hahahahahahaha.






















Levithian...you are on my hit list.
right-track is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply
Page 29 of 69 « First 192728 29 303139 Last »

« Previous Thread | Next Thread »

Similar Threads


Terms & Privacy - Contact Us - Music Banter - Archive - Top

© 2003-2024 Advameg, Inc.