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View Poll Results: Hey. Did you just grab my ass?
Yes... 30 34.48%
From where I'm standing that is a physical impossibility 26 29.89%
Sh...Should I? 31 35.63%
Voters: 87. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 07-28-2019, 04:21 AM   #23811 (permalink)
county fair energy
 
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i don't understand why you couldn't just bang at her house
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I know what real life is, I've been living in it for well over a decade
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WWWP is pretty but should be cancelled (digital blackface)

#DEMODFROWNLAND
#TERMLIMITSFORMODERATORS
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Old 07-28-2019, 05:24 AM   #23812 (permalink)
Zum Henker Defätist!!
 
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Originally Posted by Mondo Bungle View Post
pretty much the hottest girl in existence took an immense interest in me the other day like you wouldn't believe. Constant heart melting eye contact. Then I had to go and be a dumbass and say that I was homeless, so she bought me a pizza before heading out and that stubborn part of my mind keeps thinking that she might have thought that I only saw her as a charity case. And now I'll probably just never see her again for the rest of my life.. Pussy loser over here.

I'm mad.
I'd give you hugs but I think drugs would help more.
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Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien
There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 07-28-2019, 09:21 AM   #23813 (permalink)
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Never bring up being homeless on the first date.
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Old 07-28-2019, 12:40 PM   #23814 (permalink)
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My ex from back in the day liked the fact I was broke and lived in a **** area. Some sort of novelty seeking or something cause she was a spoiled art student.

She said something along the lines of "I think it makes you more of a real person" and I was like at least one of us gets to enjoy me not having any money.
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Old 07-28-2019, 12:51 PM   #23815 (permalink)
one-balled nipple jockey
 
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Originally Posted by jwb View Post
My ex from back in the day liked the fact I was broke and lived in a **** area. Some sort of novelty seeking or something cause she was a spoiled art student.

She said something along the lines of "I think it makes you more of a real person" and I was like at least one of us gets to enjoy me not having any money.
Funniest post in a long time

Like elph real outloud laugh (rare for me these days)
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Old 07-28-2019, 01:05 PM   #23816 (permalink)
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Never bring up being homeless on the first date.
"I'm so glad we moved in together, baby."

"Yeah me too I was homeless."

"What?"
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Quote:
Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien
There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 07-28-2019, 01:08 PM   #23817 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by Doug McClasky View Post
"I'm so glad we moved in together, baby."

"Yeah me too I was homeless."

"What?"
Btw, I might be a little short on rent this month.
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Old 07-28-2019, 01:20 PM   #23818 (permalink)
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And me and the boys are going to hang out and... take our insulin so if you could make yourself scarce.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien
There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 07-28-2019, 03:04 PM   #23819 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by jwb View Post
Never bring up being homeless on the first date.
she asked for my story, it's easier than lying about having a job and a pad when I just hella actually don't
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Hmm, what's this in my pocket?

*epic guitar solo blasts into my face*

DAMN IT MONDO
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Old 07-28-2019, 03:05 PM   #23820 (permalink)
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Maybe tell the next one about your music projects? Honestly though if she wanted "your story" and wasn't into your actual story then it probably wasn't meant to be. But at least if you can distract her with you being a musical genius you could get laid before she lost interest.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien
There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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