I'm mildly observant... I've noticed you not getting jokes and sometimes being unable to detect sarcasm, I just pinned that down to you not being good at noticing internet sarcasm, a lot of people can't detect internet sarcasm.

I've also noticed you call people retards, when I say 'people' I mean Captain_Caveman. But still, not that you ARE retarded but I would've thought it would be a word you'd steer clear of the word.

Language evolves slightly differently between two groups separated by an ocean: film at eleven.

I have trouble getting jokes in real life too, whenever people tell me something in a serious tone I take it seriously. I also have a terrible habit of remembering commands and directions even right after they're given to me. My rote memory is terrible.

I'm not offended by the use of the word retard. I'm more offended by how so many people on the internet think aspergers is f*cking hilarious.

I went to high school with a girl who didn't know who the Beatles were. Here's the story: The school jazz band was playing an arrangement of "With A Little Help From My Friends" and on the program the writing credits said "Lennon/McCartney". So this girl comes to me the next day in the middle of a class with a program and says "Who are these guys?" To keep it simple I said they were two members of the Beatles. She says, "I've never heard of them before! Are they good?" The whole class started laughing.

I was diagnosed with dyslexia when I was about 10, so up until then teachers and other students used to think I was a little dumber than every one else because I couldn't read or write at the same level as everybody in the class. But getting a diagnosis helped tremendously and I started to practise reading and writing like hell. My comprehension and math skills improved as well. Now I'm halfway through university. But I could always play music. For some reason, notes on a page made more sense to me than a bunch of crazy symbols :)

I used to date this girl who asked me one time what Nazis were, I kid you not.

Is there a back story? How did that conversation unfold? Why did you date a 4 year old?

So many questions!

There's not really much more to the story than that. She was 21 at the time and I was 20. I made some comment about Nazis for some reason and she said, "Wait, what's a Nazi again?". So I had to explain to her what Nazis were.

"Wait, what's a Nazi again?"

Wow.

I had to explain to someone what an Inuit was the other day:

Me: "You're such an Inuit!"

Them: "What's an Inuit?"

Me: "Eskimo."

Them: "Oh."

Not on the same level as explaining what a Nazi is though.

I know a girl who didn't what the holocaust was. So, I stopped talking to her as much.

Sounds like her and my ex-girlfriend should hang out.

Actually I wouldn't consider someone stupid at all if they didn't know what an Inuit was. I wasn't aware of the word until a few years ago, before that I just called them eskimos.

It's not really a word that pops up in everyday conversation. People I know rarely use specifics like that when referring to eskimos they're just eskimos.

Yeah, the girl I had the conversation with is pretty smart so it's not THAT stupid of her to not know, as like you say - it doesn't pop up a lot in conversation.

I thought it was slightly stupid though, I thought everyone knew what an Inuit was.

+1 For intelligent conversion :rolleyes:

now the real question is will you show the strength of character to overcome the disability and establish control over the issues they present to you? or will you just use it as a carte blanche to keep being a social misfit / instigator?

This is just kind of rubbing salt in a bloody gaping and potentially infected wound but I just found the timeline of when the mainstream radio faction went from "mostly sucking" to "sucking big time".

All you need to do is look at the track listing on the Big Shiny Tunes releases from 1996 to 2009. For those not aware, Big Shiny Tunes is a yearly Canadian compilation of what was most popular on the radio for that year. Because it's a Canadian publication there are a lot of bands who mostly got famous on Canadian radio but it's not exclusively Canadian.

Big Shiny Tunes - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Just look at the tracklistings on the wiki, from 1996 to 1999 it was pretty good, even 2000 was decent, but then look at the one from 2001...

It looks fairly consistent to me.

Consistently bad?

Consistently mediocre. It looked like there were a few okay songs and a bunch of crap on each one.

One of my friends is deathly afraid of spiders and we were playing hacky sack and it landed outside of this pine tree and we were freaking him out tell him there were spiders there and he said "You gotta dress like a spider, so they think your one of them..".

Isn't that just him making a joke? Rather than him being stupid.

Eh I thought the first few were a little bit better. Those were actually some of my first exposure to music so perhaps I'm mistaking a thought out critique for nostalgia.

A bloke at work once tried to lock me in a toilet cubicle by jamming a wedge under the door.

The door opened inwards!

He never lived it down. :D

I remember buying Big Shiny Tunes 4 only because it had the song "All Star" on it. I don't think I have any of the other ones. I'm not that into compilations.

It's scary how many copies get sold though. I mean each one of them has gone multi-platinum and I think Big Shiny Tunes 2 is the best selling CD in Canada. I think they are kind of like Nickelback CD's, where some kids grandparent buys it for their grandchild not knowing what their grandchild likes. Either that or parents get them for their kids as a stocking stuffer because they all come out in December.

:laughing:

this is an awesome thread!!!!! HAHAHA!

A school parody of who's smarter than a fifth grader: What weighs more, a pound of feathers or a pound of lead.
A girl I know still doesn't get that joke. This school play was 3 months ago.

Trenna, to my friend who's Asian: If you grab my ass again I'm gonna punch you in the balls.
My other(white) friend: Trenna, Asians don't have balls.
Trenna: Oh, what the hell?! I never knew that!

Trenna: My family doctor has cancer. How do doctors get cancer?
My friend Chantel: They get it from all the sick people they take care of.
Trenna: Oh, that totally makes sense...

A better question is will you stop being a douche all the time?

I'm not using it as an excuse for my instigating, that's not really something I attribute to the aspergers that's just in my nature.

Trying to do things on my own is a struggle not just because of me but because I have a severely overprotective legal guardian who doesn't really believe I can do anything on my own. I've slowly been learning how to cook, as far driving, combined with the fact that nobody is eager to teach me I'm not really eager to learn either. I drive people crazy when I ride with them because I'm very paranoid and the kinda person who might freak out just because someone is pulling out of the drive way and I think they might crash into us.

I am planning on taking a GED test, my mom and my brotherr got one, my brother says he didn't even study for it but that's what I'm going to do because I want to get as high of a score as I can. People tell me I'm smart enough but I think they're just being nice, I'm not really confident but I want to try it anyway. It's just the idea of getting one which is dumb because I don't think I would be able to do anything I'd want to do if I had one anyway.

The guy thought he was the works prankster.
We used to play football during our dinner time's during the summer months and he would use a vaporiser with water in it to cool himself down.
He could never understand why we would all stand laughing at him everytime he used it...


...until someone told him I'd been pissing in it for weeks. :D

Not sure I can beat that one.

Although a mate of mine did go into Subway and ask if a 6 inch sub was a footlong, which I thought was kinda funny :D

:laughing:

We went to this restaurant last week, my cousin and I.
Then this waitress comes, and she goes: "If you needed anything, I'm the waitress in charge of this table, and my name is Tina" and she goes.

After a few minutes, my cousin and I were ready to order, so my cousin looks were this Tina girl is, and raises his hands and waves for her to come.
She looks at him, smiles, waves back, and goes away.

What a weird girl. I think she felt we became her friends after this long introduction.

Did she ever come back?

No. We called another person. She didn't even return to our table.

That's great. :laughing:

Lmao, that reminds me of the time me and my mates went down to the underground subway train station place and asked for a 6 inch meatball marinara. Hilarious.

Once me and two friends were hanging around at my house when this 10 year old named Cole came over. He's this annoying little twat who likes to come over and play my guitars. Cole wanted some cookies. I said "Yeah, I'll get you some in a minute."

I had to go to my room for some reason. I spotted some leftover yogurt from when I ate breakfast in my room. Then I went into the kitchen and got the cookies, and out yogurt on top of one. I gave it to cole. I told him it was "a special ingredient". He ate them.

Then I told him it was semen on the cookie and that I had just jerked off on it. Then I told him boys can get pregnent from eating semen and that he probably would. He actually believed me, and started crying. We all went outside and he said, "Oh my God my dad's gonna kill me if I get pregnant."

I told him the only way to get rid of the semen was to throw up. He made himself puke 4 times and ate some rasberries we found so he could throw up once more. I told him,"Sorry man, I don't see the ****." After that I told him that maybe we could kill the baby by punching him in the balls. I punched him six times and then said,"Okay, that should do it. Oh yeah, boys can't get pregnant."

He started crying again and then ran home, and me and my friend's laughed our asses off.






...I just realized I'm a horrible person.

I hate annoying 10 year old kids.

A customer today asked me if there was a special plug adapter for a shaver, he said he tried to plug it into a normal plug socket but it wouldn't fit. I did my best to keep a straight face and be helpful.

Not sure if I understand this one.