Try living in Utah. We are drowning in the Mormon reign right now. ****ing theocracy.

Utah seems awful solely because so many of those Mormon mommy blogger cooking blogs (with the Russian novel-length essays before every recipe) that I accidentally stumble across are based there.

Utah is a weird place. Most of us are liberal except the Mormons. And the Mormons control everything. My friend's mom kept showing me their secret hand shakes. Most specifically the one a dude gives a girl to let her know he wants to **** her because I guess they have a secret handshake for that. I think my friend's mom wants to **** me.

The ones that live 7 goddamn miles from the border of Texas. What phony ones do YOU chill with? Given you live in New York, pretty sure you're hanging out with Puerto Rican's mostly.

Nah that's down in the city.

I'm hanging out with mostly Mexicans, Peruvians, Colombians and yeah some Puerto Ricans.

Anyways they aren't pounding back tequila and margaritas or any of that other stereotypical ****.

Your border Tex Mex friends are out of touch with their roots.

Are margaritas actually a Mexican stereotype? I always associated them with middle-class single white chicks trying to drown their blossoming mediocrity.

The drinks I associate with those types are cosmos and mimosas.

And margaritas.

I feel dead today. Oh right it's monday. ****.

So you listen to Bauhaus?