I don't agree about Kung Fu Panda, I thought that movie was very good and one of the better CGI kids films not made by Pixar.
Anyway.
I have a list that I mentioned earlier, of the worst movies of all time, it's based on a criteria and popular consensus rather than my personal opinions. B movies are excluded so it won't surprise people what number one is.
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This is the stupidest movie I've ever seen, and not in a so bad it's good way either, in a "how in the f*ck did this L. Ron Hubbard guy become a religious figure?" kinda way. It's insultingly stupid, I know a great deal of Hollywood movies are insultingly stupid but Battlefield Earth took that kinda stupidity to a whole new level.
This is a movie many of you have heard about, but I doubt most of you have seen it, you have to see it to believe just how terrible it is.
Travolta's performance as Terl is so insanely over the top, but that's really the only entertainment this film has to offer. The film is ugly to look at, the aliens look unbelievably lame, the special effects are decent but bland and uninspired, the color scheme is mostly blues and yellows and it makes half of the film look like it was submerged in a toilet (a combination of toilet bowl cleaner and piss). And everything is shot at a Dutch angle (which is traditionally used to create a sense of confusion or disorientation) and it seems that the filmmakers did this for no reason other than to look as arty as possible.
Not to mention how mind blowingly stupid the whole plot is.
The aliens in this movie are called Psychlos and in addition to looking like Rastafarian Klingon Mimes they are also pants on head retarded, these guys have ruled earth for 1000 years and yet they don't know ANYTHING about humans, not even what food we eat,
not even our language. Why? Wouldn't that make things easier? Another thing is that the aliens actually speak perfect english,
sometimes, other times they don't at all and we need subtitles. What sense does that make? It's like they couldn't make up their minds.
Well it gets more retarded, because they actually do have a device that allows humans to understand their language but they inexplicably never use it, until now, Terl is the head of security at the prison where human slaves are kept and boy does he suck at it, one of the humans has assumed leadership status among all the prisoners and has tried various times to escape, for SOME reason Terl decides that he should teach this guy everything, including the language and how to use the weapons and fly the ships, he also gives him access to the library of congress so he can learn about the history of his race. This Terl fella is supposed to be the villian btw, what a failure, did he not think about the consequences at all? He claimz to be very highly educated so that speaks volumes about this dipsh*t alien race that somehow managed to overthrow us.
By the way, how do the aliens survey the human slaves when they're at work camps? Instead of standing guard like anyone would, they use a small little probe that flies by every couple of minutes and to take one grainy black and white photo. Genius.
Now, what the Psychlos use human slaves for is mining gold, that is what they came to Earth for, PRECIOUS GOLD! Now the humans decide they need to earn Terl's trust, so they go to Fort Knox to take all of the gold bricks that are kept there and present them to him. So let me clarify, these aliens came to Earth in search of gold and didn't even consider that maybe the humans have been keeping it somewhere? It took a bunch of primitive cavemen to figure it out, how stupid can you get?
Even more stupid is how these aliens lose at the end of the movie, the human hero (played by Barry Pepper) decides to teach some of his friends how to fly old jetcraft (which after 1000 years of decay still manage to work perfectly) by using flight simulators, this takes place in just a few weaks, and it's only after a few weaks of training that a half dozen cavemen who have NEVER flown an actual plane before manage to defeat the entire Psychlo airforce in just a few minutes. Now it's stated earlier in the movie that these same aliens managed to take over the Earth in just 9 minutes, defeating all of the world's armies, HOW? These same assh*les couldn't defeat 6 jets that are thousands of f*cking years old and piloted by people who didn't even know what a f*cking jet was a few weeks prior, how are we supposed to believe these guys could defeat the entire human race when they still had all of their technology?
And then of course there's the climax, the hero uses a teleporter to send one of his friends to the planet of the Psychlos for a suicide bomb mission, it's a cruddy little bomb but it manages to blow the whole planet up because and get this, it's atmosphere is completely made up of radiation and hydrogen, how convenient. How does that even work? It means that in this planet's whole existance there could have never been an accidental fire or explosion of any kind, and considering how damn violent the Psychlos are that's pretty damn hard to believe. All it would take anyway is a fart to set that entire planet aflame.
The film ends with Terl being kept prisoner at Fort Knox with all of the gold, oh I get it, ironic.
Seriously L. Ron Hubbard was retarded, how does someone like this get a religion with a membership of over 8 million? Facts like that scare me.
