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Old 09-29-2006, 08:00 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Memory of Yesterdays/Follow The Path

it is more or less two, but both follows the same meaning,

Memory of Yesterdays/Follow The Path

Clouds pass on by over the crescent moon,
Your mind fogged from the images of before,
From the dreams and nightmares of yesterdays,
With girl you never knew and the life you never lived,

What you see if different from what you know,
What you see is different from what you lived,
What you know is the dream is forever,
What you know is the memories of the unknown,
And you will always wonder about the memory of yesterdays,

Clouds role pass the crescent moon,
Your eyes tear from thoughts,
Of the angel you cant see,
And girl you never knew and the life you never lived,

What you see is different from what you know,
What you see is different from what you lived,
What you know is the dream is forever,
What you know is the memories of the unknown,
And you will always wonder about the memory of yesterdays,
__________________________________________________ _______________
Now you see what there is,
The haunted thoughts of the unknown,
The faces forgotten from time,
The ones you don’t know and the ones you love,
And the stars will bring you to the unknown,

If you ask your heart a question,
Never question that answer,
Never expect the easy answer,
Just listen to the choices,
Just follow the path it gives you,

The people standing all around,
The faces of the crowd,
The voice of the angel in the wind,
The voice you heard form years ago,

If you ask your heart a question,
Never question that answer,
Never expect the easy answer,
Just listen to the choices,
Just follow the path it gives you,

Follow the voice you know,
To the life you never knew,
Follow the words in the wind,
To the girl you want to know,

If you ask your heart a question,
Never question that answer,
Never expect the easy answer,
Just listen to the choices,
Just follow the path it gives you, 2x
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Old 09-29-2006, 08:07 PM   #2 (permalink)
butt say x
 
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Location: so i read the question as "Where YOU live" which was kinda funny instead of "Where you live"
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There's some grammatical errors in it (if they get fixed it will flow much better) but you have progressed from your first song.
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Old 09-29-2006, 08:09 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Yeah, you quit doing sucky led zeppelin rip offs and went straight to sucky.

lolz jokin' its pretty good at first glance, i'll critique it later.
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Ive seen you on muiltipul forums saying Metallica and slayer are the worst **** you kid go suck your **** while you listen to your ****ing emo **** I bet you do listen to emo music
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Old 09-29-2006, 11:08 PM   #4 (permalink)
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I liked the first part, its pretty nothing really wrong with it.

I don't care for the second part, I find excessive repeating of certain parts of lines annoying.

As for the third part, maybe describe the moon with something other then crescent? Theres alot of repeated wording in here.

Fifth part, you used unknown twice, which looks kind of bad.

Sixth part, Maybe use solution instead of answer on one of them, take out the just at the start of the last verse also.

Seventh part, i'd personally say something like words of an angel.

To the girl you want to know seems kind of a weak way to end that part.

This is probaly the best i've read by you, I suggest reading some books and expanding your vocabulary cause their was alot of repetition in the lyrics.
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Ive seen you on muiltipul forums saying Metallica and slayer are the worst **** you kid go suck your **** while you listen to your ****ing emo **** I bet you do listen to emo music
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Old 09-30-2006, 01:44 PM   #5 (permalink)
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when im typing nothing comes to mind word wise, i know what i want to put, but i just cant think of the word at that time
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