actually the lyrics were improvised in fact the entire recording was an improvised song, not much of it was planned

Oh! That's interesting, Stone Birds...I couldn't tell that your song was improvised. I am impressed that the song hung together as well as it did given that you were making up the lyrics as you sang them!

some newer remixes:

We Were Promised Jetpacks - Conductor (Stone Birds Remix) FatCat Records - We Were Promised Jetpacks - Conductor (Stone Birds Remix) - SoundCloud THIS WON A REMIX CONTEST

Stars - We Don't Want Your Body (Stone Birds Remix) Stars | MXP4 (click on vote for other versions, then most recent mine will say Stone Birds)

The Gravel Road
 

Listen to it HERE

Move along
At a steady pace
don’t leave
a single trace

cause or I’ll find you
in the woods
in the the caves
it’s no good

you’ve got a problem
I’ve got a problem
Let’s get together
And make more problems

You take your time
To follow me
well why don’t you
just say something

those shining lights
the street fights
did ya get the clue
that it was all for you

Love is a lie
Yes I know
But oooh oh

There’s really no point
It’ll never happen
So why oh why

Did we feel this way for eachother
And didn’t even say a single word

Driving on the gravel road
We will never do
What we’re told

The book is burned
The dog is dead
The car is stolen
And so was my bed



But that’s okay
That’s alright
Cause we know how to put up a fight

We will sing until the clocks strikes
5 hours after midnight

low and behold I am the god
that you were thinking of

I’m that narcissistic
That sarcastic
But that’s why you like me

Am I that foolish
That unobservant
Is it true

Love is a lie
Yes I know
But oooh oh

There’s really no point
It’ll never happen
So why oh why

Did we feel this way for eachother
And didn’t even say a single word


feedback would be appreciated

Alice & Abel Met on the train
they didn't say much but they felt the same pain



i'll try to upload the instrumental for this some other time

The general theme of the song as i read it is someone(perhaps yourself personally) encountering a new sense of Self-awareness. The song focuses on a fact "love is a lie" and extrapolates from there to relate to a personal situation from the songwriter/singer.

The aspect of self awarness in the song and maybe coming to grips with a "fact" but then circumstantially wishing it were otherwise- seems to be like a conversation with oneself or your conscience maybe? Maybe like the voice of reason?

My boss won't stop yakkin at me while I write this so hopefully it loks like a complete train of thought that relates to your song lol.

Oh yeah talking about your gravel road song. I don't knoww if this is the kind of input your looking for but as a song writer myself I like the lyrics and thought I'd share.

Stone Birds - "The Tide Will Come In"

Someday the tide will come in
someday my love will return to me

we have no control over the lives our brothers
we have no control over the lives our sisters

Someday the tide will come in
someday my love will return to me
Someday the tide will come in
someday my love will return to me

my brothers my sisters stop playin god you'll never win
my brothers my sisters don't tread in the garden

Someday the tide will come in
someday my love will return to me
Someday the tide will come in
someday my love will return to me

Someday the tide will come in
someday my love will return to me
Someday the tide will come in
someday my love will return to me

Someday the tide will come in

Stone Birds, I like the main idea of the song.

One recommendation I have is for the vocals. It sounds like you have used your voice in chorus/harmony throughout the song. Have you considered just having some segments where you sing in a strong solo voice without the background harmony? The harmony gives the vocals a droning feel.

Also, since you repeat the same lines again and again, sometimes it got repetitive to me. I felt you could increase the volume of some of the background instrumentals that disappear in the mix. For example, were you using some harmonica? I thought I heard it very faintly. Making these background instrumentals stand out more could give more uniqueness to the different segments of the song.

there's no harmonica, there is a kazoo and it plays atleast once within every bar after the intro

"White Laces"
 

"White Laces" stream on Soundcloud (this is a link)

Did you
need a
friend

That you
could
rely on

To make you feel
Better
To heal your wounds

When we die
Where do we go
If you’re in heaven I do not know

How could they
Say
“Go kill yourself”

they put you down
they singled you out
well you showed them, didn’t ya?

You took a rope
Attached it to the ceiling
And there you were

When we die
Where do we go
If you’re in heaven I do not know

You were floating above your bed
Like an angel with white laces

On the day
of your funeral
they will cry

cause they know
that they’re the reason
that you died from suicide

and all of them
will stand over
your grave

When we die
Where do we go
If you’re in heaven I do not know

Birds are singing of your pain
for ye white laces, ye blood hath stained

Stone Birds,

I really enjoyed the beautiful piano and delicate drumming at the beginning of your song. Lovely, really.

I recommend that instead of adding more layers of vocals, you actually cut some out. For example, rather than starting your vocals as a chorus, I recommend you start singing as a solo. When you sing in chorus, the sound is very murky and muddy...hard for me to understand...so I'd like a solo voice in some places to stand out clearly.

My favorite lines are the ones above in bold. The image is very strong: I imagine in my mind's eye this girl (I assume) dangling above her bed from her noose, with her untied shoelaces dangling below her tennis shoes. Although maybe she used her shoelaces to hang herself? You mix sadness and beauty very well.

I felt in other places your lyrics were too clear, spelling out the situation too obviously, such as in these lines:

AwwSugar often complains about my lyrics being too obvious. Similarly, I feel that in this part in your song, you don't need to make explicit that person killed herself or himself, since earlier you explained how and why the person did this without resorting to using the word "suicide."

Since birds don't really sing of someone's pain, this line broke me out of the trance-like mood of your song. Also, I recommend you avoid using the archaic "ye" and "hath" in the last line, and just say, perhaps, "for your white laces that your blood has stained."

But actually, when someone hangs herself, is there much blood? Don't people usually just bleed a little at the mouth? I feel your last two lines cross over into melodrama. When describing a very sad situation, I feel it is hard not to do that. I like the parts of your lyrics when the descriptions are more restrained and poetic.

Your song reminds me of "Strange Fruit" sung by Billie Holiday, about white people murdering African American people by hanging them from Southern trees so that the murder victims become "strange fruit," stinking and grimacing with bulging eyes. I felt you may wish to listen to this song since it also describes hanging in a unique and memorable way, similar to your image of the person in your song being like an angel with white laces.

PLEASE VOTE CONTESTANT #3 Stone Birds
SoundOps MixOff - Fall 2010

Not necessarily. The song posted above you is a little more techno-ish, which doesn't have to lend itself to structure really.

hmm im not sure about that last line their,

in "saviour" or in "white laces"?

sav·iour
   /ˈseɪvyər/ [seyv-yer]
–noun
1.
a person who saves, rescues, or delivers

i wanted to make it obvious that the song wasn't about religeon



"Birds are singing of your pain for ye white laces ye blood hath stained"

i actually like that kind of diction (when i can understand it)

if i made it normal it'd look like this:
"Birds are singing of your pain for your white laces your blood has stained"

it doesn't have the right feel to it for me personally

"Golden Houses (DEMO)" Stream and download

In my mind I see fields of flowers
Tiny birds flying high, and people with magical powers

All our dreams are filled with things we can’t comprehend
Like lost loves, bottomless pits and golden houses

The riverbed is filled with all of my repressions
I think I said that I needed some more therapy sessions

cause the patterns they are holding me down in a bind
and all of my friends they don’t understand the complexities of the human mind

All our dreams are filled with things we can’t comprehend
Like lost loves, bottomless pits and golden houses

What do I got is it a disease spreading through my memories
A twisted order to complicate my already strenuous social standings.

All our dreams are filled with things we can’t comprehend
Like lost loves, bottomless pits and golden houses


the recording is just a demo some voices may be rerecorded i'm having my friend kay do guest vocals, and i'll be adding guitars and possibly some xylophone.


PLEASE VOTE FOR ME!!!:

Sleigh Bells - "Rachel" http://www.indabamusic.com/submissions/show/40040
Gordon Voidwell - "Ivy League Circus" http://www.indabamusic.com/submissions/show/39038

"Caterpillar Song"
 

Stream and Download "Caterpillar Song"

Oh tiny caterpillar
You’re fat and useless
Oh little caterpillar
You’re weak and small

Look at this photograph
Look at this smile
Did you know that It’s faked
Just like the rest in the pile
How could I be happy
When I felt so alone
I was just a bother
Hidden like a dog’s bone

Oh such a puny cocoon
It’s soft and wretched
Oh what a worthless cocoon
It’s gross and cheap

People told me
That I was nothing more than
Crap in the yard.
A little boy with a guitar
They said I’d never amount
To anything
That I was talentless
I couldn’t sing

Oh beautiful butterfly
Alluring and graceful
Oh shining butterfly
You’re now something people cherish and love

It took some time
But now I’ve found
the ones who can appreciate
the sounds I create
I finally feel accepted
I finally feel like I have wings


i'm gonna rerecord the vocals with my snowball mic i originally recorded them with the apple mix bad choice but it'll get fixed.
btw i got 9th place in the Sleigh Bells "Rachel" remix contest i'm getting skull candy headphones and a bunch of sleigh bells merch.

So... Uhmm...

So… Uhmm…

i’m thinking about rerecording all my songs or atleast parts of all my songs i’m thinking about going for a slightly different sound

this basically includes these:

Da Da Demos by Stone Birds on SoundCloud - Create, record and share your sounds for free (once link is outdated i’ll put a strikethrough in)

basically what i’m gonna do for the most part is rerecord vocals and replace some of the drum programs with actual drums and percussion. and i’m gonna try to make it all more natural sounding. this means no more recording vocals at 1 a.m. so if any of you think you want to keep the original recordings i’d download them now

in fact i'm thinking about changing my moniker

I suggest you give it a title "Hero".