Physical discipline against children .. okay or not?

~~RandyMarsh~~ · 02-02-2011, 03:30 PM

If I had a kid and ANYONE smacked them, brother or not, I'd tear off their ****ing hands with garden shears.

Burning Down · 02-02-2011, 03:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RandyMarsh

Buy a dictionary? Before the internet there was these things called books...

In fact, I do own a dictionary, and under corporal punishment it says: Physical punishment, such as smacking, caning, or whipping. So to me, it seems as though smacking somebody - even lightly - to punish them in some way, is a form of corporal punishment. I'm curious as to how you came to the conclusion that smacking a child lightly is not corporal punishment.

Scissorman · 02-02-2011, 03:40 PM

I think that a lot of kids do things they shouldn't just because they know they can get away with it. Example: A child deserves to be physically punished if he/she is, let's say, torturing an animal, bullying another kid or something like that. However, I don't think that a child should be beaten if he/she, for example, gets a B on an exam, or doesn't do homework (which some parents I know do)

djchameleon · 02-02-2011, 03:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Scissorman

I think that a lot of kids do things they shouldn't just because they know they can get away with it. Example: A child deserves to be physically punished if he/she is, let's say, torturing an animal, bullying another kid or something like that. However, I don't think that a child should be beaten if he/she, for example, gets a B on an exam, or doesn't do homework (which some parents I know do)

Tiger Moms tend to do that. they are highly disappointed when their child doesn't get an A. Some go as far as to beat them because of it which is just beyond up surd but if that's how they want to raise their perfect little creations who am I to tell them different that they shouldn't or force them to pay a fine for it.

CanwllCorfe · 02-02-2011, 04:00 PM

I would if I absolutely had to. But like fighting, I think violence usually comes as a result of mental weakness. I intend to weight my teachings more on the fact that if they do the right thing, they will be rewarded. As opposed to if you they do the wrong thing, they will get punished.

djchameleon · 02-02-2011, 04:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CanwllCorfe

I would if I absolutely had to. But like fighting, I think violence usually comes as a result of mental weakness. I intend to weight my teachings more on the fact that if they do the right thing, they will be rewarded. As opposed to if you they do the wrong thing, they will get punished.

so if they do the wrong thing what will you do?

Guybrush · 02-02-2011, 04:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Janszoon

What is the punishment for a parent who slaps lightly?

It very much depends on the case and context, but I think commonly, you're looking at something from a fine up to 1 year prison for excercise of violence towards someone like your kid. If you've damaged the kid, for example breaking an arm or caused him or her a lot of pain (whatever a lot is), then I think you may be looking at 4 years prison or more.

Quote:

I think that a lot of kids do things they shouldn't just because they know they can get away with it. Example: A child deserves to be physically punished if he/she is, let's say, torturing an animal, bullying another kid or something like that. However, I don't think that a child should be beaten if he/she, for example, gets a B on an exam, or doesn't do homework (which some parents I know do)

There are other ways of discipline. Based on the studies I posted a couple of pages ago, it's clear that corporal punishment teaches kids and adolescents violence. It may also make your kid scared and frustrated, all things which may lead to a higher likelihood of your kid bullying or being violent towards other kids. You may get conformity in the short term, but if you want well behaved kids, other disciplinary methods may be more effective in changing long term behaviour.

~~Dirty~~ · 02-02-2011, 04:40 PM

Wow, possibly a year in prison for light smacking. That is laughable in my eyes, I can't believe that is actually a law.

As far as the studies go, I had looked stuff up like that before and I can't bring myself to put too much stock into the results. There are just too many variables to consider. Like one study said about how low-income, lower-class parents are more likely to hit their children. Are their behavioral problems as teens and young adults because of the spankings or is it other factors, perhaps an unstable family structure, or effects of poverty or something like that? I feel like the term "corporal punishment" is too broad for what we are really talking about here. I don't even want to use the term because everyone can realize the big difference between light spanking and whipping your kid with a belt. It's like using the term "drugs" when there is obviously a big difference between smoking weed and smoking meth.

So of course I think "corporal punishment" is going to lead to problems for people down the road, because the term includes everything from light spanking to beating a kid with a broomstick or punching them or something. All I know is that spanking your kid is pretty normal around here and nobody seems to have a problem with it. I know kids that were beaten by their fathers who DID grow up to have violence issues. But I don't see how light spanking at a young age would lead to growing up and abusing alcohol, hitting your wife, etc. I knew in my early teen years that I deserved the spankings that I got as a child, and it helped teach me right from wrong. I was easily able to understand why I was spanked and that hurting or injuring me was not the idea behind it. It was to teach me a lesson and I am grateful for it.

At a young age, when cognitive abilities and critical thinking is still limited, I feel like the best way to teach someone is by spanking them. Sometimes telling kids "no" doesn't work, they don't understand or care.

Guybrush · 02-02-2011, 04:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dirty

As far as the studies go, I had looked stuff up like that before and I can't bring myself to put too much stock into the results. There are just too many variables to consider. Like one study said about how low-income, lower-class parents are more likely to hit their children. Are their behavioral problems as teens and young adults because of the spankings or is it other factors, perhaps an unstable family structure, or effects of poverty or something like that?

As I wrote earlier, scientists are not complete idiots. What you're describing is the danger of hidden variables which is likely the most well known pitfall of statistics known to science. Really, they are aware of these potential problems and have methods to work around them to reach their conclusions. Had it been one study with some obvious flaw, I could've seen your point. But we're talking about a wealth of studies and it's not like science is without quality control.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dirty

I knew in my early teen years that I deserved the spankings that I got as a child, and it helped teach me right from wrong.

Right from wrong is obviously very subjective. From the point of view of me and perhaps Scandinavia in general, it didn't teach you right from wrong because you think violence is an okay part of bringing up your child. To me, had you learned right from wrong, you would've learned that you don't hit kids. Excercising your parenting philosophy here would be a crime punishable by law.

So, the "it helped me learn right from wrong" point, which has been made a number of times, has little very relevance and actually seems ridiculously ironic/hypocritical from here.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dirty

At a young age, when cognitive abilities and critical thinking is still limited, I feel like the best way to teach someone is by spanking them. Sometimes telling kids "no" doesn't work, they don't understand or care.

You write as if saying "no" is the only disciplinary alternative there is to corporal punishment. If these kids are so cognitively handicapped, do you expect they will really understand dad's justification for hurting his kid? I don't think so, but I believe it hurts, both physically and emotionally. I also know kids learn real fast from their parents behaviour and will absorb that spanking like a sponge.

Paedantic Basterd · 02-02-2011, 05:01 PM

Do you consider those of us defending spankings as punishment as violent individuals, and thus a product of the cycle?

View Poll Results: Physical punishment aganist children. Acceptable or Unacceptable?
Acceptable	50	56.82%
Unacceptable	38	43.18%
Voters: 88. You may not vote on this poll

02-02-2011, 03:40 PM	#493 (permalink)
Scissorman art is sold for money Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Belgrade, Serbia Posts: 730	I think that a lot of kids do things they shouldn't just because they know they can get away with it. Example: A child deserves to be physically punished if he/she is, let's say, torturing an animal, bullying another kid or something like that. However, I don't think that a child should be beaten if he/she, for example, gets a B on an exam, or doesn't do homework (which some parents I know do) __________________ facebook Last.fm The Music I make http://www.indabamusic.com/opportuni...missions/52856

02-02-2011, 04:00 PM	#495 (permalink)
CanwllCorfe Quiet Man in the Corner Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Pocono Mountains Posts: 2,480	I would if I absolutely had to. But like fighting, I think violence usually comes as a result of mental weakness. I intend to weight my teachings more on the fact that if they do the right thing, they will be rewarded. As opposed to if you they do the wrong thing, they will get punished. __________________ Your eyes were never yet let in to see the majesty and riches of the mind, but dwell in darkness; for your God is blind.

02-02-2011, 03:30 PM	#491 (permalink)
~~RandyMarsh~~ Account Disabled Join Date: Jan 2011 Posts: 130	If I had a kid and ANYONE smacked them, brother or not, I'd tear off their ****ing hands with garden shears.

02-02-2011, 04:40 PM	#498 (permalink)
~~Dirty~~ Account Disabled Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: USA Posts: 981	Wow, possibly a year in prison for light smacking. That is laughable in my eyes, I can't believe that is actually a law. As far as the studies go, I had looked stuff up like that before and I can't bring myself to put too much stock into the results. There are just too many variables to consider. Like one study said about how low-income, lower-class parents are more likely to hit their children. Are their behavioral problems as teens and young adults because of the spankings or is it other factors, perhaps an unstable family structure, or effects of poverty or something like that? I feel like the term "corporal punishment" is too broad for what we are really talking about here. I don't even want to use the term because everyone can realize the big difference between light spanking and whipping your kid with a belt. It's like using the term "drugs" when there is obviously a big difference between smoking weed and smoking meth. So of course I think "corporal punishment" is going to lead to problems for people down the road, because the term includes everything from light spanking to beating a kid with a broomstick or punching them or something. All I know is that spanking your kid is pretty normal around here and nobody seems to have a problem with it. I know kids that were beaten by their fathers who DID grow up to have violence issues. But I don't see how light spanking at a young age would lead to growing up and abusing alcohol, hitting your wife, etc. I knew in my early teen years that I deserved the spankings that I got as a child, and it helped teach me right from wrong. I was easily able to understand why I was spanked and that hurting or injuring me was not the idea behind it. It was to teach me a lesson and I am grateful for it. At a young age, when cognitive abilities and critical thinking is still limited, I feel like the best way to teach someone is by spanking them. Sometimes telling kids "no" doesn't work, they don't understand or care.

02-02-2011, 05:01 PM	#500 (permalink)
Paedantic Basterd Music Addict Join Date: Sep 2010 Posts: 5,184	Do you consider those of us defending spankings as punishment as violent individuals, and thus a product of the cycle?