Quote:
Originally Posted by ladyislingering
Does he make you feel worthless, imply that you're stupid or below him in any way? Is he manipulative/does he exploit what he knows to be your weaknesses or your most sensitive psychological traits in order to control your behavior? Being emotionally and verbally abusive is just as much a problem as someone who's physically abusive and prone to bouts of extreme rage.
If he can look you in the face while you're crying from something he's said or done because he's cut you so deeply that you have no other way of handling the situation because it just shuts you down at the core of your soul, and he doesn't react, doesn't feel the need to apologize or try to understand what his behavior is doing to you, he's a piece of garbage and you need to be rid of him ASAP.
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To be fair, the really effed up things he's done happen when I've made him angry. Sometimes his anger is totally legit - I've lied to him about parts of my past (issues with drugs, having an abortion), I've done things behind his back because I think his demands are unreasonable (like listening to music or drinking socially), and I've done some really stupid things that I try to hide once the mania passes and reality kicks in. The thing is, he's vicious when angry and some of the things he's done seem out of proportion to my crimes. He's set fire to things I cherish and put out the flames by urinating on them. He's sexually humiliated me and he's said some truly awful stuff too. But, I drove him to it. He's hacked my social media and read my journals, but I did the things he discovered so I can't get mad about the violation of privacy, even if the last time I made an entry was two years before we met. I'm really stupid and that frustrates him too. Basically, we probably wouldn't have the issues we do if I was a better girlfriend.
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