She'll need an STD test before I drink that beer, but after that no one can stop me.

tfw it's too hot :(

didn't realize it got hot in england

I think he means that the sun came out.

didn't realize they had sun in england

didn't realize the sun was a homo

Sometimes it's hotter than parts of Africa.

Where do you think rainbows come from?

TFW you're really drunk and you try to get up, but then you're like, maybe next time.

"I guess I don't have to piss that bad."

"I guess my work uniform will just wash itself."

tfw you've spent a good 30 hours playing Minecraft over the past three days. I'm trying so hard to not grow up.

Watch out for the pedos.

YouTube Personalities Use 'Minecraft' to Prey on Underage Fans | Motherboard

Was this any surprise though? The obviously fake british accents and excessive enthusiasm were dead giveaways.

My little brother plays that game and loves the youtube videos. I don't get it. The people in the videos come across like, well, pedos. And the game makes no sense at all. I just build a virtual life in a game? Like sims?

tfw you put a sandwich on a grill and then you go to mb and forget all about it and this happens.

https://scontent-mia1-1.xx.fbcdn.net...51&oe=57D09CF3

Im still eating it.

^eat it then share a photo of the poop it makes.

I too wish to see this poop.

Srry guys, im reserving that one for FB.

Well now I gotta find something else to fap to.

^^ Does anyone else think that the right side of the sandwich could be cast as a character in a Duncan Jones film?

Quick update, the bottom part was edible.

You just came back, letting us all know that you're not dead, and now you're eating death sandwiches?

It still tasted better than Subway. Ive eaten worst honestly, the bottom part, the ham and the cheese were still intact. Also my bowel movement was ok. :yeah:

You think of a song, get it stuck in your head, and five minutes later it's on the radio.

You're My Best Friend by Queen, btw.

When you wake up reach for your tablet and notice you didn't charge it.

Now i can totally relate.

I generally never have that problem because my phone makes the most annoying sound ever recorded every two minutes when it's running low on power. That sound is the bane of my existence.

I usually have that problem cause i always mess up my chargers. To charge my phone i have to slightly tilt it and to charge my tablet i have to wrap the chord around it.

So do Puerto Ricans have to buy their electronics from yard sales?

Let me answer that question with another question, When was the last time you saw a yard sale in the ghetto?

Im not middle class Batty, im government cheese class.

So do Puerto Ricans have to burglarize their electronics?

Yes. So that i can buy a psp for 5 dollars.

A "hot" PSP?

Yes, which proceeds will most like go to heroin.

win/win

But what if you want a Game Gear? How you gonna find that without modern Western methods of buying ****?

Nobody but collectors want a game gear but im sure i could find a dusty one at a flea market. Plus ya know, we also have the internet ijit.

Seriously?

When you know you've been listwening to a radio station that strictly plays only 60's 70's and 80's songs for four years and they start playing Smooth by Santant and the original Life is a Highway. 1999 and 1991!

TFW you can't go to sleep early around friends because they will **** with you and take pics of their handy work while you are sleeping.