How are you homeless and shopping at ****ing Whole Foods?

Whole Foods lets you chill there for as long as you like as long as you're not rowdy.

Food staaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamps

the ravioli was only 1.49$ too

Food stamps and shops at Whole Foods. You must really hate yourself.

It's actually a "thing." We can't afford to get all our groceries at the local health food store, but we do get our meat there, and every time we go it's like a motley mixture of literally-starving artists, hipster college kids, and a token on-the-prowl cougar or two.

i'd fit the category of starving artist. hey, sometimes I go to burger king or subway.

Meat at a health food store.. lol

Health food...lol

Tfw there's nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do

tfw you bless the rains

tfw I don't know what that is but I would do anything for love except it.

Tfw I can't drive 55. 54, 56 maybe, but 55 eludes me.

Tfw if youre doing 54 im goin round ur slow ass but at 56 we cool.

Tfw you can relate.

tfw 55 really means 70

tfw your mum puts chocolate in the fridge.

You're stretching.

I'm honestly not sure what I think it means but it definitely means something filthy.

tfw you're holding in a fart at a public urinal

TFW you're sweating and then you fart, and it feels like you might have let something out but it turns out to just be ass sweat disturbed by the gas. Of course you still have to change your underwear cause now it has a big, damp line going down the middle and who wants to sit on that?

I thought you enjoyed your own filth? Youve changed...

tfw this

Isn't that the secret to Arby's sauce?

Just let it rip!

Tfw Lucem's ban is all-too-soon expired :(

Tfw the bus driver is ****ing bat**** insane

You go Burger King and eat-in and they double your sides, chilli cheese bites and onion rings.

Tell Charles thanks.

I don't do sides. Thank the front counter fags.

TFW you're drunk and you don't realize you're cold until you're like holy **** am I cold why am I naked in the cold?!

good question

Do you actually wear clothes at home?

TFW mimosas at work.

yes...? i have roommates, what kind of question is that?

I asked if we could have booze at work last Christmas and was denied. **** Burger King.

when I worked at McDonalds someone working counter got caught hiding liquor in the shake machine hahahaha

They think I'm drinking orange juice.

I just hid it in my bookbag like a smart person. Of course this was when I used to work nights after the dining room was closed, so I could just hang it up in the bathroom and take frequent potty breaks.

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