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Old 04-20-2006, 01:46 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Question Nightmares and Love

I'm not completely finished with it, It really needs work. Beware, it's only the chorus, but I wanna know if it's good to start out with...

Setting Sun

Love between two

falls like stars

from the midnight blue

I cared and shared,

but got stabbed in the back.

Letting this nightmare run it's track.

My day has come I will not fear

the light in the distance will soon be near.

you will be sorry and you will pay

for all that **** you did to me that day.


I would love some constructive criticism if at all possible. Just say what you like about it (or don't) and what needs to be removed or changed! It would help alot!
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Old 04-28-2006, 02:49 PM   #2 (permalink)
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yea I edited it, it's coming along quite nicely I think.
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Old 04-28-2006, 04:22 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Anyone? (I'm spamming again )
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