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05-24-2005, 02:16 AM
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#1 (permalink) |
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Groupie
Join Date: May 2005
Location: In the back of your head....
Posts: 2
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I Want To
this is my first set of lyrics posted here...reviews etc please...
I Want To What is it that I’m living for, I don’t think I’ll breathe anymore, Is life this bad or is just me, Push my fingers into my eyes so I don’t see, All the things that break my heart, I want to bleed, I want to scream, I want to die, I want to… Kinda feel like I’m okay, Satisfied I’ve got my way, I’ve killed the life in my heart, And now I stay in the dark, So I can feel this hate, I want to bleed, I want to scream, I want to die, I want to… I want to… I want to… Bleed, I want to… I want to… Scream, I want to… I want to… Die, I want to bleed, I want to scream, I want to die, I want to… My life is a joke to you, Stopped being happy and bled right through, I won’t let me control my soul, My head is like a hole, And now I’ve reached the bottom, I want to bleed, I want to scream, I want to die, I want to.
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05-24-2005, 04:44 PM
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#3 (permalink) | |
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Bright F*cking Red
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: San Diego
Posts: 2,222
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not horrible....but as everyone who posts on here will say: its been done before. the lyrics are also too simple for my taste, there isnt enough content. with your next song, try to make a little more of a story (if you take my meaning), rather than just talking about how much someone hates you, or saying "i want to die". people go for songs, not three and a half minutes of talking about how you want to kill yourself.
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How'd I end up here to begin with? I don't know. Why do I start what I can't finish? Oh please, don't barrage me with questions to all those ugly answers. My ego's like my stomach- it keeps shitting what I feed it. But maybe I don't want to finish anything anymore.. maybe I can wait in bed 'til she comes home. and whispers.... Quote:
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05-24-2005, 06:18 PM
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#4 (permalink) |
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snickers
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: detroit
Posts: 2,194
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^
That depends if you talk about suicide in an interesting manner. Like... Look on the bright side suicide Lost eye-sight I'm on your side Angel left wing, right wing, broken wing. Lack of iron and/or sleeping.... nice, beautiful. Umm, your poem Heart of Nails is cliched A LITTLE....lol. I think it's just that teenage-angst phase. Be a little more creative, you can do it.
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A mi no me importa nada Para mi la vida es un sueño |
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