Dad Jokes

Plankton · 02-06-2018, 09:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wolverinewolfweiselpigeon

Not a dad joke but a toddler one - one of the kids I nanny revealed this morning that he made me a book of jokes he made up for my birthday. He gave me an example:

"What do you call Gordon (from Thomas the Train) in a sandwich?"

"A salad!"

More to come once I get my hands on this treasure.

The next Don Rickles right there.

Trollheart · 02-06-2018, 10:06 AM

I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous!

WWWP · 02-06-2018, 10:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Plankton

The next Don Rickles right there.

It's amazing how similar our senses of humor are lol. I remember a joke I made up when I was his age:

Knock, knock

Who's there?

Glasses

Glasses who?

Let me in, it's freezing outside!

**Frownland** · 02-06-2018, 10:09 AM

My cousin told me this one once

Why do bikers always wear chains?

Because they have to use the chains later.

Classic.

The Batlord · 02-06-2018, 10:09 AM

I was gonna tell it once but then I pussed out.

Plankton · 02-06-2018, 10:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wolverinewolfweiselpigeon

It's amazing how similar our senses of humor are lol. I remember a joke I made up when I was his age:

Knock, knock

Who's there?

Glasses

Glasses who?

Let me in, it's freezing outside!

My daughter, age 6:

Daughter: Whens the weekend?

Me: This Saturday

Daughter: (Patting her belly) Nuh uh, BIIIIG MOMMMA!

*giggles*

18 years later and she still can't explain it, but we always have a good chuckle about it.

Plankton · 02-07-2018, 12:14 PM

Pet_Sounds · 02-07-2018, 01:08 PM

Me as a toddler (which wasn't so long ago):

"Knock knock."

"Who's there?"

"Tim."

"Tim who?"

"TIMBITS!!!"

Trollheart · 02-07-2018, 02:13 PM

What did one Horseman of the Apocalypse say to the other Horseman of the Apocalypse when he looked sad and down?

"Cheer up, pal! It's not the end of the world!"

The Batlord · 02-07-2018, 02:15 PM

Not a joke.

02-06-2018, 10:06 AM	#262 (permalink)
Trollheart Born to be mild Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: 404 Not Found Posts: 26,970	I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous! __________________ Trollheart: Signature-free since April 2018

02-06-2018, 10:09 AM	#264 (permalink)
Frownland SOPHIE FOREVER Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: East of the Southern North American West Posts: 35,548	My cousin told me this one once Why do bikers always wear chains? Because they have to use the chains later. Classic. __________________ Studies show that when a given norm is changed in the face of the unchanging, the remaining contradictions will parallel the truth. d e a f b o x

02-07-2018, 12:14 PM	#267 (permalink)
Plankton Just Keep Swimming... Join Date: Apr 2012 Location: See signature... Posts: 7,766	__________________ See location...

02-07-2018, 01:08 PM	#268 (permalink)
Pet_Sounds Remember the underscore Join Date: Feb 2014 Location: The other side Posts: 2,489	Me as a toddler (which wasn't so long ago): "Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Tim." "Tim who?" "TIMBITS!!!" __________________ Everybody's dying just to get the disease

02-07-2018, 02:13 PM	#269 (permalink)
Trollheart Born to be mild Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: 404 Not Found Posts: 26,970	What did one Horseman of the Apocalypse say to the other Horseman of the Apocalypse when he looked sad and down? "Cheer up, pal! It's not the end of the world!" __________________ Trollheart: Signature-free since April 2018