.

Her double fisting fetish? No, no, no. My double fisting fetish. She just a happy compliant.

Ahhh, so that's why she's your ex.

Tfw the old sales dude in the office turns changing an ink cartridge into an all morning affair. It's like watching a slow deliberate car wreck.

Did you bring popcorn?

I am ill-prepared.

I wouldn't care or even have noticed it, but the printer in question is right next to my office, so it's a fun distraction.

I knew it would come down to him asking me for help. Turns out the cartridge was bad.

How's that for anticlimactic.

"Accidentally" spill it, ponder how exactly you'll clean it up (this will take up most of your time), and make someone else clean it up.

I went full Guy Fleegman on him. "Look around you, try to form some sort of rudimentary bracket!"

For reference (ignore the actual lathe part):

This isn't as anticlimactic as I thought. That's hilarious.

Does that even mean anything?

I had to do something.

Sure. It means go watch Galaxy Quest.

I have that movie. Awesome. I was asking about your "advice".

Check out Voivod.

I was a joke. Not real advice. I repeat... not real advise.

Was or am?

Is that like being an accident?

I'm sorry that's just so deliciously evil I had to make sure.

Yes.

I freakin' love that movie. It's really underrated. I';m really looking forward to the Amazon TV series coming up.

I guess it's all right? Maybe.

TFW you ask your class for examples of socially responsible companies, and one student says TEPCO (Tokyo Electric Power, you know, the one responsible for Fukushima!). Then another student says TV stations and newspapers because (and I quote) "they control our opinions."








.

You're the teacher, you know what you have to do.

*smack*

Or

*teach*

Also I imagine you as a comic book character.

I do a bit of both.

Actually, I just shook my head and said, "Ummm, I think you guys misunderstood the question. You're giving prime examples of irresponsible companies."

Then I moved on to the listening section of the class. Derp.

TFW your employer tells everyone they're moving to online paystubs to be more ecological but then does a printout of your paystub from the online page, puts it in an envelope, and places it in your mailbox. So, in order to save paper, they use more paper. Should've expected as much working for the government. The waste I see is staggering; this latest idiocy is merely the tip of the iceberg.

Tfw you're perusing a geek forum, and find this:

http://i539.photobucket.com/albums/f...psunixvvsf.jpg

lol @ all the other tunes

:clap::clap::clap::clap:

TFW when you live with someone and you get up for the first time in hours to use the bathroom, and just as you're about to leave your room you hear the bathroom door close. Like, really? You have all day to do whatever it is you're about to do and you choose the moment I'm about to **** on myself. **** you, world.

Have you tried, like, not living with your mother?

I'd still probably end up with a roommate who'd want to take long showers after I just went to Taco Bell.

Go in her bedroom, make sure all the windows are closed, lay a towel by the door, rip a few huge ones, and then leave. She'll never hog the bathroom again.

Might as well shit on her bed too.

You should always take the extra step.

OMG it's open! Aaaahhhhh... that's better.

tfw when your ex calls you and flirts with you for like 45 minutes straight and you want nothing more than for them to hang up and **** off already :-)

You ever try hanging up on them??

i can't do it :-(

It's not hard. Just press the "End" button.