TFW you pick a really nice booger at work and want to eat it but there's a camera right there so you just flick it onto the floor.

Did you wash your hands before making food for people?

What's the dirtiest thing you've seen at work btw? I want to hear those horror stories.

Well, there a rumor back around 1980 that Gino's (they had a contract to make Kentucky Fried Chicken in Baltimore until KFC opened its own restaurants) cooked and served a fried rat at one of its franchises.

At a KFC near me, they found faecal matter in the drinks dispenser, like where you get refills. The ice part of that.

They also found faecal matter in a curry restaurant, apparently that one was bad and it got shut down and the owner was taken to court.

Some horror stories with some take away places but tbh you know which ones to avoid. Anything that doesn't specialise in one type of food is a no for me.

I use to work restaurant. The worst I saw happen was a fellow cook dropped a scoop of ice cream onto the floor, and he picked it back up, rubbed the dirt off the best he could, and put it back in the bowl. The only reason he went out of his way to do that was because apparently this customer was horrendous.

We had the occasional wing **** up. In the middle of a rush, the fry cook would toss the wings in the wrong sauce, so instead of starting over, he would wash them off with water, dip them in the fryer in and out a few times, then toss the wings in the correct wing sauce.

Not too bad then.

I would eat a washed wing.

Someone who may or may not be me once put a pube in some douchebag's sandwich, but I'm really the only filthy **** who lives up to restaurant horror story hype. It's way tamer than you'd think. We just want to get you the hell out and ****ing with your food takes extra time.

lmao

worst i did when working at mcdonald's was serve a customer a fish fillet that was at least 18 hours old. we're supposed to throw them out and cook new ones every like 40 minutes or something crazy like that, just didn't feel like going through the effort of waiting on a new one in the fryer. it looked so hard and dry it probably hurt his teeth to bite into.

Closest I've come to a blowjob in years.

Bro, no place anywhere throws the food away when they're supposed to. If it's up for a couple hours and looks only barely recognizable then we might take pity on the customer, but otherwise those rules are completely ignored at all fast food joints.

I have, and there's really no significant difference if you do it right.

i mean a few hours is one thing - and we definitely did that a lot, but this thing was so hard it could've probably stopped a bullet.

hahaha, that's bad. Was it a drive thru customer?

sure was. it was also definitely within 30-45mins before the store closed iirc, so he had it coming by ordering a ****in' fish fillet that late.

There is a top notch chippy at the bottom of my road. Was ran by a Greek guy, the family of Greeks all worked in it, a great bunch of lads. Been going for years since I was about 8 and they would give the kids lollipops when they wait in the queue for their order.

Anyway what I was going to say is I would turn up just before it closes and they would chuck a load of free food in. Fish cakes, scallops, sausages, batter bits and the like. Go in with 40p to buy a couple of scallops five minutes before it's due to shut and nobody is in there and come out with loads of food.

It was such a great chippy. But now it has been taken over by an English family who are not as good, and it is shit. So I go to another chippy now.

That's pretty impressive even by my lack of standards, and I pride myself on being the Al Bundy of the fast food world... I even mercilessly mock our customers' weight and appearance without realizing that I'm emulating that great man... woah. No wonder I loved that show so much as a kid. I'M AL ****ING BUNDY!!!

great story mate, 10/10.

it's a good thing we didn't work at the same fast food restaurant because i guarantee we would be fired in no time, probably following a game of fast food 'chicken' to see who could come up with the grossest thing to do to a customer's order.

thanks mate. I'm hungry atm.

lmao

Man, my store manager will drop a wetass burger patty on the floor, look to make sure no customers are looking, reach down and put that **** right on that bun, then shamelessly hand it to some grinning kid who thinks he's getting gold. I think we'd be fine.

I know I'm glad I stopped eating fast food :laughing:

Plenty of people don't do that btw. My boss and I have a reputation with our fellow employees for being "triflin". So don't let my bull**** scare you from buying grade-F , processed cardboard.

I just realized that Monkey didn't say anything about not eating boogers, he just wanted me to wash my hands afterward. Dirty ****er.

Tfw you snap on someone on a forum, but then you feel bad for it.

Someone asked me to collaborate on a song.
I accepted.
I am now producer/mixer/bass player on song.
Drums, guitar parts come in.
Sounding great.
One other guitar part comes in.
Doesn't sound so great anymore.
Decide not to use other guitar part, but will compromise and create 2 versions.
I stay up all night trying to make it work.
I miss work the next day, due to lack of sleep.
I'm out a few hundred dollars from missing work.
I also missed interviewing 2 new potential hires, and had to reschedule, which pushes a few other important things back.
Someone not even a part of collab comes in thread and says how eff'ed up collab is, and is very critical of person who started collab.
I snap.
Call dude an *******, and give him a big hardy **** YOU.
Dude wants to fight. Wants me to call him to tell him that "In Person". Says I'm a tough guy.
I laugh. I mention that this isn't High School.
I apologize for out break, but mention how I don't tolerate bullies.
No response.
Thread has been dead for a couple days now.
I feel bad.

I hate the internet.

U wanna take this to 2 the streets, boi?

Sho me ur ju jitsu.

How about a nice hardy Roshambo?

I SAID SHO ME UR JU JITSUl

i can’t imagine Plankton being rude to anyone that isn’t Buttlard

*unzips*

Right? I try to go out of my way to be both nice and a complete dick.

...which ties nicely into the first comment.

Aw yeah. Now we got a stew going.

Called me a moron once lol.

http://www.musicbanter.com/lounge/41...only-1112.html

#11115 onwards

2 cheap shots at my expense? Ok.

*adjusts scorecard*

#notthattherereallyisascorecardcommaitjustmakesmel ooklikeIknowwhatIapostrophemdoingandhavesomesortof rudimentaryplaninplace

^

Was just bants mate.

Still find it funny Charles replied lol or maybe he was banting as well.

lol that tune is both >>> and <<<

Right in the bants.

I'm in the mood for bantsing

The bants are no good.

Captain Underbants

I post on a math/science forum. Every week, math challenge problems are posted.

TFW people with graduate degrees in math can't crack a problem, but you solve it in five minutes with high school calculus. Feels pretty damn good. :afro:

Life 101:

https://scontent.fsan1-2.fna.fbcdn.n...3d&oe=5AD3967E

**** the cynics. This is simply beautiful.

It's the avatar. It's definitely the avatar.