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Showing results 1 to 21 of 21
Search took 0.00 seconds. Search: Posts Made By: acenoface
Forum: Song Writing, Lyrics and Poetry 01-16-2009, 11:38 AM
Replies: 38
Views: 5,397
Posted By acenoface
Thank you very much, that looks much nicer on the...

Thank you very much, that looks much nicer on the page
Forum: Song Writing, Lyrics and Poetry 01-14-2009, 03:59 PM
Replies: 38
Views: 5,397
Posted By acenoface
Regret (a heavy tune)

Put your house in order my friend
Soon your life will come to an end
With this task
You will ask
Have you done more harm than good

Self reflection wasn't your style
Now you put your conduct...
Forum: Song Writing, Lyrics and Poetry 01-08-2009, 06:25 PM
Replies: 38
Views: 5,397
Posted By acenoface
Question Siren Song

Always remained faithful
And my love was sincere
But it became shameful
When your Siren Song entered my ears

Seemed like a true godsend
'Cause our first date was fun
Thought I'd a new...
Forum: Song Writing, Lyrics and Poetry 04-12-2008, 03:16 PM
Replies: 38
Views: 5,397
Posted By acenoface
Post Mile High Club

Not sure how well the lyric fits with the music (http://acenoface.com/mhc.mid) but I hope you enjoy:

So glad she shared an aisle with me
On this magic flight to Angel City
Worked up the nerve...
Forum: Indie & Alternative 12-19-2007, 10:30 AM
Replies: 3
Views: 1,413
Posted By acenoface
Thanks, but what artists would you say I sound...

Thanks, but what artists would you say I sound like?
Forum: Indie & Alternative 12-17-2007, 02:22 PM
Replies: 3
Views: 1,413
Posted By acenoface
A favor for a terminally ill piano rocker

About 3 years ago, I was diagnosed with Lou Gehrig's disease, and I quit my job and started writing music to leave an artistic legacy to outlive me. I've got some songs I'm really proud of now, and...
Forum: Song Writing, Lyrics and Poetry 12-14-2007, 06:57 PM
Replies: 38
Views: 5,397
Posted By acenoface
If there were no rules to songwriting, why would...

If there were no rules to songwriting, why would Berklee School of Music offer several courses in, and a certificate, in songwriting? Why would books on music and lyric theory be so popular?
Forum: Song Writing, Lyrics and Poetry 12-14-2007, 05:45 PM
Replies: 38
Views: 5,397
Posted By acenoface
I think Sheila Davis, PhDauthor of The Craft of...

I think Sheila Davis, PhDauthor of The Craft of Lyric Writing and others would disagree
Forum: Song Writing, Lyrics and Poetry 12-14-2007, 04:07 PM
Replies: 38
Views: 5,397
Posted By acenoface
lyrics are written for the ears, poetry is...

lyrics are written for the ears, poetry is written for the eyes, and both have rules
Forum: Song Writing, Lyrics and Poetry 12-14-2007, 09:12 AM
Replies: 38
Views: 5,397
Posted By acenoface
you might not like it, but undisciplined lyric...

you might not like it, but undisciplined lyric writing usually results in unsingable lyrics
Forum: Song Writing, Lyrics and Poetry 12-13-2007, 03:28 PM
Replies: 6
Views: 1,481
Posted By acenoface
You're right, my psychoanalyst says I'm anal...

You're right, my psychoanalyst says I'm anal retentive :)
Forum: Song Writing, Lyrics and Poetry 12-13-2007, 12:34 PM
Replies: 6
Views: 1,481
Posted By acenoface
This is really good! Great use of near rhymes,...

This is really good! Great use of near rhymes, definitely cliche free. The lyric packs an emotional punch, for sure.

Technical criticism:

promise and business are a weak rhyme. If you need a...
Forum: Song Writing, Lyrics and Poetry 12-13-2007, 11:55 AM
Replies: 38
Views: 5,397
Posted By acenoface
nope, that's one word. mosaic rhymes are when...

nope, that's one word. mosaic rhymes are when you rhyme a long word with more than one short one:

thorazine
you're the queen

see how all three syllables match?

also, magazine doesn't rhyme...
Forum: Song Writing, Lyrics and Poetry 12-13-2007, 11:26 AM
Replies: 38
Views: 5,397
Posted By acenoface
let's see if either of these critics can come up...

let's see if either of these critics can come up with their own trisyllabic mosaic rhyme for thorazine
Forum: Song Writing, Lyrics and Poetry 12-12-2007, 01:16 PM
Replies: 38
Views: 5,397
Posted By acenoface
it's not poetry, they're lyrics. they're meant...

it's not poetry, they're lyrics. they're meant to be sung, not read.
Forum: Song Writing, Lyrics and Poetry 12-12-2007, 10:07 AM
Replies: 38
Views: 5,397
Posted By acenoface
boo hoo, you break my heart :) I guess this...

boo hoo, you break my heart :)

I guess this guy has never heard of near rhymes, cause damn if I'm gonna rhyme salad with ballad
Forum: Song Writing, Lyrics and Poetry 12-12-2007, 09:58 AM
Replies: 7
Views: 1,337
Posted By acenoface
Good imagery, yes, but I don't see a rhyme scheme...

Good imagery, yes, but I don't see a rhyme scheme or a rhythmic pattern. It seems more like free verse than a lyric
Forum: Song Writing, Lyrics and Poetry 12-10-2007, 11:40 AM
Replies: 38
Views: 5,397
Posted By acenoface
acenoface's Songwriting Journal

Searched my person without cause
Tossed me like a salad
Brain was charging like a herd
No way to corral it
Made me take an orange pill
Easy on the palate
Could a word be more obscene
Here's my...
Forum: Song Writing, Lyrics and Poetry 12-10-2007, 11:31 AM
Replies: 6
Views: 1,591
Posted By acenoface
Very good! I'm willing to bet you've served in...

Very good! I'm willing to bet you've served in Iraq or Afghanistan.

One technical criticism:

And nothing can save a wretch like me
No grace, no faith, no sympathy

These words don't really...
Forum: Song Writing, Lyrics and Poetry 12-10-2007, 11:04 AM
Replies: 10
Views: 2,734
Posted By acenoface
Sorry, but writing good lyrics requires more...

Sorry, but writing good lyrics requires more effort than that. You need to at least pick a constant thyme scheme for the verses. I used to write lyrics too fast, too, but I get better results after...
Forum: Song Writing, Lyrics and Poetry 12-10-2007, 10:43 AM
Replies: 15
Views: 2,980
Posted By acenoface
Not long ago you were a waitress forlorn Is...

Not long ago you were a waitress forlorn

Is not conversational. Never end a sentence with an adjective, unless it's preceded by a derivative of 'to be' (a waitress who was forlorn).

Try...
Showing results 1 to 21 of 21

 
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