Advice and critique for lyrics

minkaloo · 06-19-2013, 06:54 AM

Hi, I'm new to the website and as the title says, I appreciate any critique you may give me for my lyrics and any advice given are welcome since I want to improve my skills in lyrics writing

anyway here goes, the song is called "Lights Out"

(Verse)
What a mess
What a mistake I've made
for always thinking you felt the same
Oh what a shame
to be honest I'd rather be alone
than take your awful tone
don't want to hurt anymore
don't want to expect anymore

(Pre-chorus)
When did we drift apart?
Weren't we there from the start?
Well I'm not so sure
But I now know that for sure that the

(Chorus)
Lights are out
In our young hearts
The feelings we have is now dead and gone
So I guess this will be goodbye
Let's move on with our lives
Because the love we had is gone
Lights out

This isn't complete yet but I want to see if I'm making good progress with the song. Thank you for taking the time to read this

06-19-2013, 06:54 AM	#1 (permalink)
minkaloo Groupie Join Date: Jun 2013 Posts: 3	Advice and critique for lyrics Hi, I'm new to the website and as the title says, I appreciate any critique you may give me for my lyrics and any advice given are welcome since I want to improve my skills in lyrics writing anyway here goes, the song is called "Lights Out" (Verse) What a mess What a mistake I've made for always thinking you felt the same Oh what a shame to be honest I'd rather be alone than take your awful tone don't want to hurt anymore don't want to expect anymore (Pre-chorus) When did we drift apart? Weren't we there from the start? Well I'm not so sure But I now know that for sure that the (Chorus) Lights are out In our young hearts The feelings we have is now dead and gone So I guess this will be goodbye Let's move on with our lives Because the love we had is gone Lights out This isn't complete yet but I want to see if I'm making good progress with the song. Thank you for taking the time to read this